Chapter 11 Eyes Opened To A Different View

**Dear reader, the chapter is long, so make yourself a cup of coffee or tea and settle in for a lot of story!
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Our Samsara island had a whole different vibe about it now.

Winter was definitely on its way.  Cool November air rolling off the mountains on the mainland, brought frost in the morning, and water too frigid to test with even your toe. We warmed our island home with a crackling fire in the basement and our days were spent inside keeping warm, playing with the babies who were too young to go outside in the chilly air.  Soon it would be Christmas and the parents were busy with preparations to make the babies first holiday a time to remember……….in pictures anyway.  Wasn’t like they were going to remember anything no matter how memorable they made it. Although I guess it was for us as well as them, so I will just keep quiet about it all.

Three days after the Richards family sailed off with my two adorable puppies, a really nice older couple came to take Josey and Jack home with them.  I stood on the beach with Biscuit at my side, watching the motor boat drive away and cried, like I was losing Sophie all over again.  Even though I had fought Jin on the decision, it was the right thing to do, I knew.  I just hoped that all four of them had a better life than we could give them in our current state of baby land.  Their happiness, the babies and the dogs, was more important than my selfish desires.  Speaking of babies……..

The “little monsters”, as I secretly call them, were much more settled these days, leaving behind the newborn state which had us fumbling around like zombies during the day and night.  No longer were we getting up every two hours to care for them.  Now, if we got them down around midnight, they would stay happily asleep till 530 in the morning. It still wasn’t a full nights sleep, but it was certainly better than before.

So daytime chaos of puppies barking and dogs chewing on squeaky toys, had been replaced with sounds of cooing and sweet little baby giggles.

(As you can see, Biscuit is also suffering in the lack of sleep department.  Poor guy!)

All should have been well from that point on, but life was never easy, especially in this family.  It seemed all we did was trade one set of problems for another, and another…….

Problem # 1 – Biscuit

The first night after all his friends were gone, he sat by the dog dishes and refused to eat, as if he was waiting for them to return and wouldn’t do so until they did.  I had to sit down beside him and offer little bits from the palm of my hand, cooing to him in a gentle whisper that we loved him and would never send him away.  I felt so bad for taking away all his friends. Later that night when Biscuit fell asleep, Jin took away all the extra dishes, beds and toys, to help Biscuit understand his friends would not be coming back. Yet it didn’t help.  Each and every morning, there he sits for a good hour, waiting, hoping for one or all of them to return.   At this point, I believe it’s also very important to point out that he has been on his utmost best behaviour since we had our screaming match in the living room.  Can dogs understand what we say?  I wonder, but if that is true, when will he begin to believe me when I tell him he will always be with us?

I don’t know what to do to bring back the happy-go-lucky family member we had with us before and honestly my time is so limited between the babies and my new homework schedule.  I just don’t have the time to spend with him as I did.  So he wanders around the house, bored most days, so bored he has even started watching tv!

It’s like he is mesmerized.

We started calling him our fifth baby, and everyone has taken responsibility for making sure he is fed and happy.

Problem #2 – Secrets

As a child I always knew certain events and discussions were happening in the household, that were obviously being kept from my knowledge.  These are the things witnessed as a child, you stick in the back of your brain and basically forget about, till it happens again.  I guess I just thought it was adult stuff, none of my business, but as I got older I began to realize they could be more classified as secrets.

Something was definitely going on, for more than once, I had heard my name whispered between Jin and Sun during those private conversations.  So I started to pay attention.  It was little things at first until one day…….

Mama had asked if I could listen for the babies taking their afternoon nap, while she laid down for a nap herself.  Grand-mere was already sleeping and Jin was writing the next few chapters of his novel, so I took the baby monitor into my room to do a little reading. I was working my way through reading all of my father’s published books, now that I was old enough to do so.  It made me feel closer to him, like I could get to know him, even a little.  About an hour later, I heard a noise in the kitchen, then a discussion.

“You have got to be kidding me.  When will this ever stop?”

“Shhh Jin.”

Anna cried then.  Oh yes, I know their cries believe it or not.  I started to get off the bed when I heard Sun and Jin talking through the baby monitor.

“Come here my baby.  Oh, some one is stinky! So what is in the letter?” Sun asked Jin.

“It’s another request to do an interview with Jade.  Why can’t they just leave her alone? Leave us alone.”

“They will, in time,” Sun responded.

“Really? Because the amount of requests I get and the questions I am asked about her every time one of my books comes out……..I don’t see that ever happening.”

“I don’t know Jin, but she is safe here.  That is all that matters.”

“I should have sued that Quinn Archer so many years ago. Using Jade’s family status to further the success of her camp, it’s just…just wrong, despicable-“

“I know Jin, but regardless, going to camp was good for Jade. She wouldn’t be the same person she is now if she hadn’t.”

“It still doesn’t change what she did.  After all the conversations we had with her, I never would have guess she would have breached our privacy as she did. Selling those sculptures Jade made and marketing them to gain publicity for the camp! Then we made it worse when we allowed Jade to sell those paintings when she was a child.”

“Okay, I understand all that.  What about going to visit Jilly?  Don’t you think she could-“

“NO!  Absolutely not!  We don’t know Jilly’s parents that well.  We can’t trust they will keep her privacy.”

“So what?  Will you keep her a prisoner of this island forever?” Sun asked.

“Yes, if that is what it takes.”

“Oh c’mon Jin.  Do you hear how ridiculous that sounds?  There has to be some compromise here.  Like what if we….”

That was the last of the conversation I could hear, as they had left the nursery to continue their chat in another part of the house.  I was so tempted to crack open a door to see if I could find out where they were and eavesdrop some more, but I didn’t want to get caught.  None of this made sense at all.  Why would my leaving the island jeopardize my safety and what was it they weren’t telling me?

Looking to the baby monitor, I realized I had to get it out of the room or else they would know I had heard their private conversation.  Slowly I cracked open a door and listened. From down in the basement I heard more talking, but I couldn’t quite make out what they were saying.  Tip toeing across the floor, I placed the monitor on the kitchen island, where it had been before.

Jin and Sun were still talking and I just had to hear what they were saying.  I made my way onto the stairway landing, where I would still be hidden.

“I will not have her go wild!”

“Jin, there is the protective older brother and there is the OVER-protective sibling.  You are falling into the latter.”

“Fine, but I will ask you this.  Do you really want paparazzi all over the island trying to get pics of the family?  In boats, taking pics with telephoto lenses?”

“Well no, but-“

“No you don’t and you have no idea what being a 5 star celebrity is like do you?  Do you really want to find out?”

Sun sighed.  “I guess. You are right, I don’t understand, not really.”

“Even you knew who my family was.  It was one of the first things you ever said to me in Paris.  Do you remember?”

“Vaguely.  I remember asking something.”

“You said, ‘Wait!  Did you say Bell, as in Maya Bell?  Ian Bell?’  I’ve remembered that moment because at the time, I didn’t understand the significance of what you were asking me.  I knew my parents were well-known, but I never understood what that meant.  I was a child, growing up on an island.  How could I know.”

“Good point and so, are you just going to keep her in the dark?  What happens when she turns 18 and wants to leave?”

Jin never said anything and after waiting for him to say something else, I quietly retreated to my room.  I knew my family was known for differing reasons, but I didn’t understand the term 5 star celebrity.  Celebrity? My family?  Jin had to be over exaggerating. My mom was a painter and my dad did sculptures for rich people while writing about 17 books. Jin was writing books too, not quite as good as my fathers.  Don’t tell him I said that! But it’s not like they were ever in the movies!

Regardless, the way it sounded, I was never going to be able to see Jilly.  Or do anything else for that matter!

Problem # 3 – Blue Eyes

Well not so much a problem, but I had for sure spent a great deal of time dreaming about him and my heart swelled with heartache and possibilities.  It had been three weeks since Travis sailed away with his family and our beautiful little boys.  I waited by the phone, pleading with it to send me anything.  Even just a “hello” would have made this wait a little more bearable, because then I would have his phone number too.  How stupid was I not to get his number as well?  If only I had just said yes to dinner when his father asked, I could have spent more time with him, made him like me a little more. Then I wouldn’t be sitting here staring at my phone and my empty text box.

“Just a beep, c’mon blue eyes!  Text me!  Call me!  Do something!  PLEASE!”

 

I flopped back onto the bed and pressed the phone to my chest, closing my eyes to think of his gorgeous face.  The memory of his lips on mine was still so real, and I explored the feeling, dreaming of a second kiss.  His lips would be more soft than our first kiss, with his arms wrapped around my back to pull me closer to him.  Slowly his left hand would slide lower down my back, stopping just at the curve of my bum so he could fit his hips to mine and we could be as close as a couple could get……….

beep beep

I shot up and clutched my phone to my chest in giddy anticipation.  Please, Please, Please!

YES!  I danced around my room too excited to even look at what he had sent me! When I had calmed down a bit, I saw that he had sent me this:

It was only a picture of the puppies, but in my mind it was as good as a love text.  It meant he cared! Cared enough to show me the puppies were doing fine without us!  And now, I had his number!  What did I say?  I had to say something back, but what?  I had no idea, so I texted Jilly instead.

Jilly Jilly Jilly!  Guess what!  I told her what Travis had sent me.  What do I say????

I don’t know!  I’ve never had a boyfriend!  Tell him thank you I guess?

Okay but then what?  I want him to keep talking not go away again!

Jilly was quiet for quite some time and then came back with Leo said to send him a pic back.

Interesting for sure.  Did he say what the pic should be of?

More time passed then she texted, He said a hot pic of you.    TBH, though he did laugh when he told me that, so I can’t tell if he’s being serious. But a nice pic of you still sounds like a good idea to me.

A pic of me……… Okay I can do that! Tell Leo thank you for me.  I’m so excited Jilly!  I was starting to think I would never hear from him again.

I’m excited too!  Let me know what happens!

So a picture….picture of what?  I paced around my room for a while, stared at myself in the mirror some, sat on my couch and laid on my bed in a few positions.  Finally, after taking a bunch of photos, I decided on this one:

Then I added a caption of “Dreaming”.  He could take from that whatever he wanted to, whether I was thinking about the puppies, him or perhaps something completely different. Keep him guessing, hehehehe.

Besides, dreaming of him was all I seemed to be doing these days!

All he said back to me was “Thanks.  I will use it as your pic for your number.”  Geez, romantic!  Way to sweep a girl off her feet….sigh.  No matter, it was just a start and at least now I could message him.  I finished off my night by texting Jilly to tell her what had happened and show her my pics I had taken.

A few days before Christmas morning, we knew  winter had arrived on the mainland from the snow we could see over the mountain tops.  Luckily, all we had was frost dusting the tips of grass blades and giving the scenery a look of a beautiful oil painting. 

The views inspired me to paint again, something I hadn’t done since shortly before our little monsters arrived.  I had no clear idea how I wanted the painting to look, as I was going with feeling instead of a pre-formed picture in my mind. I had never tried this before, but I remembered it was something Miss Quinn had talked about at camp.

When I questioned her about it not understanding what she meant, she said “When you are ready, paintings will flow out of you and you won’t know exactly where or why they have come.”

“But how will I know I am ready?” I asked her.

“You will just know,” she said.  “The same applies to sculpting.”  She knelt down then to my level.  “Miss Jade, when you are ready, you will create beautiful masterpieces.  You know how I know? I can see it, in your pretty little eyes.”

Funny how I had forgotten about that conversation.  Just like I said before, memories stored in the back of your mind, brought out by new and familiar events in your life.

When I emerged from my room starving and ready for a break, I was met with the most wonderful baking smells coming from the kitchen.Sun was busy creating lovely masterpieces of her own, as she did every year for the Christmas holiday and our counter was filling up with lovely goodies!Jin had been busy while the babies slept, putting up festive cheer decorations and a very bright Christmas tree.  I didn’t think there was a single wall in the house that had been left bare.  It was beginning to look, and smell a lot like Christmas……

Christmas cards began arriving in the mail, the most precious ones were placed on the living room coffee table.  Those cards came from members of the Alula family, which had grown tremendously since Jin had been there last.  Foster, Oren and Dain had all found lovely young wives to join the family and two of the boys were also expecting a new family member or two, or three.  Who knows when it comes to their family!  Jin’s excitement over such great news only heightened the mood and he was looking forward to pictures he would receive of newly born babies.  I’m sure Christmas morning was utter chaos in the Alula household, as ours will be next year when the babes are todds.

I had to admit, I too was beginning to look forward to Christmas morning.  It’s silly I know considering I’m closer to being an adult than a child. But their upbeat moods were contagious and by the time I tucked myself into bed Christmas Eve, I couldn’t wait to wake up the next morning.  I woke before the bright morning sun had a chance to tickle my eyelashes and I quickly washed up to be ready when Mama Sun called me downstairs.

When she did, I resisted running down like a young child but I only got half way down when I heard this conversation.

“Oh Mama, this is way too much!  And this gift for Alex is just so over the top!”

“My darling daughter, I have no idea how much time I have left in this world and Alex is my first grand child and only grand son.  It’s my right to spoil him as much as I want!”

I stopped dead in my tracks as their conversation sunk into my heart.  First grand child…Alex….then…then what was I?  She couldn’t possibly have meant to say something so hurtful, could she?

“Jade, can you go grab Bonnie from the nursery please?”

Jin startled me as he came up behind me on the stairs where I had stopped.  It was then I realized I had been holding my breath and I filled my lungs with air, turned to nod at Jin and let him by.  Her comment resonated around my head as I walked to the nursery.  I decided just to let it go for now so we could all enjoy Christmas.

Mama Sun was right, there was WAY too much around the tree.  I had never seen so many gifts on Christmas morning.  As infants, it was completely ridiculous but I kept my opinion to myself.

Jin and Sun gave me some new clothes, which I greatly appreciated, and Margot gave me a very pretty new bracelet. Then, Jin handed me a small gift wrapped in a large gold bow.

“I tried to figure out what you would want the most, but shopping for a teenage girl is not my thing.  Guess I will have to learn,” he said looking at the babies.  “However, this is a gift I know you will love above all else.”

I opened the box, to find an envelope inside.  It was a Christmas card.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Really?”  I squealed.

“Yes really,” he said before I launched myself into his arms for a hug.  “With conditions of course but we can discuss those then.  I’ve talked it all out with Jilly’s parents and they are looking forward to having you.”

“Yay!  Best gift ever!”

“We shall see,” Jin muttered under his breath and Sun slapped him on the arm while smiling at him.

“Best gift ever, big brother,” she whispered to him.  “Did you hear that? Perhaps next time you will listen to me right away instead of being so difficult.”

“Perhaps,” Jin replied with a smile and leaned in to kiss Sun

I stopped by celebratory dancing with a look of mock, minor disgust on my face. “Ewwww! Enough of that!  Four babies is enough!”

“Jade Bell!” Margot protested.

I gave her a brief glance and ran upstairs to grab my phone so I could text Jilly.  Margot could think what she liked but for now I really didn’t want to deal with her and my hurt feelings from before gifting.  Alex first grand child, whatever.

After lunch, I heard the adults downstairs and went to investigate what was going on.

“We’re just getting Christmas pics.”

“Oh good.  Where do you want me this year?”  I asked.

“Oh,” Sun said and looked at Jin.  “We were kinda thinking of just getting pics of our babies.”  Then she looked at Jin again.

“You know,  since you are all grown up now.  We thought maybe we would send a pic of our children to the Alula family, as they have done for us every year.”

“I see,” I said, trying not to sound hurt.  “Well I don’t want to be underfoot.  I’ll uh, just go back to painting.”  I smiled hoping it looked genuine, before turning to head upstairs.

“Jade, c’mon?”  Jin called after me.

“No worries,” I responded without looking back.  I had no idea what was happening.  Had I suddenly lost my place in this family?  I am not going to freak out, I said to myself.  Just be the bigger person and let it go………………………….  pfffft, going to be hard to let this go.

They did get a really cute pic though. 

Bonnie, Alex, Anna and Baby # 2, now called Bella.  Yup, Bella Bell.  I had to admit though, it was kinda pretty.  I don’t know why, but for some reason Bella had become my favourite out of the four.  Not that they weren’t all cute in their own way, but for some reason, Bella and I just clicked.  She is getting ready to cry in this pic.  I almost wish she had.  Yup having trouble with the letting it go thing, but I’m working on it.

Once Christmas was over, life resumed as normal.  Jin was working on the finishing touches of his latest book and I was struggling with the new courses in school.  Every time I asked for help, I was told to do it on my own.  I was old enough to figure it out without help and lastly without fail, I heard the babies come first.  But some of these classes I had never taken before and it felt a little like being thrown into the rapids without a life vest.  I was thoroughly frustrated and ready to say screw it.  In three months I had only raised my grade from a D to a C and it was a low C at that.  All I needed was a little guidance to get me on the right track, so why couldn’t they help me?

Spring arrived and our monsters had already grown so much, rolling around on the floor and lifting themselves up on their arms.  Each one had a very distinct personality and I loved them all so very much.  This auntie thing really was a piece of cake.

Bella still held a very precious place in my heart and I loved taking her to my room to play her in between house chores, caring for Biscuit and my very grueling school schedule.

Bella had such a vibrant happy personality which drew you in, making her irresistable. Playing with her, helped me to understand the “your own child” thing that Sun was talking about after they were first-born.  And even though she wasn’t mine, she felt like she was, just a little.

Jin’s book Two Sims Apart was published shortly after Christmas and although it didn’t make the best sellers list, sales had taken off making it his best book yet.  He was excited at the prospect of finally making a name for himself as well as improving his writing skills to produce a better book. The publisher needed him to come into the office to sign paperwork, making him their newest, permanent writer.  He declined saying he couldn’t leave the island. Could they just fax him the papers to sign?  But they insisted he come and so he reluctantly agreed.

“I can’t go,” he said to Sun.  “What if something happens or you need me?”

“Jin the babies are not so little anymore.  They sleep through the night and are much more agreeable during the day.  I think you should go, and I also think it would be a good idea to take Jade.”

Well, you can imagine the argument that followed that statement!  Yet in the end, Sun won and I finally, finally got myself off this island!  It took us four hours to make it to Moonlight Falls, which I discovered was the most dreary, boring place instead of the city I imagined it to be.  I wanted to ask him, why oh why are not not dealing with a publisher in the city like father did?  But then I thought, perhaps this is the only company that would publish his books, cause like I said, not as good as dad’s.  Although I am really looking forward to reading his new book, which is a mystery.

Jin rented a really nice house for us to stay at for the night (no pool) but it was good otherwise.  After he met with the publisher, we stopped at the grocery story to pick up the supplies Sun had requested, which was huge I had to say!

So there we were groceries and supplies all loaded in the rental car, when he turns to me and says “Hey, want to drive?”

Like, double take!  “I thought you said, I would never drive a car!”

“Well if you don’t want to,” then he started to get in the driver seat.

“NOOO!  I want to,” I’m just in shock over here.

Driving really didn’t seem that hard.  Keep your eyes on the road, always know what is around you and watch your speed.  I was feeling pretty relaxed about the whole thing, and Jin was keeping pretty calm, which totally shocked the heck out out me.  When I envisioned my first driving lesson, Jin was always gripping the seat, breathing quickly and yelling at me to watch the road.  But there he was, completely relaxed and quietly speaking reminders to me to keep me on track.  Seriously, was he replaced with a duplicate or an alien?  Maybe he had taken one of those pills from the doctor to to keep him calm……………….

………..and it was while I was pondering this whole thing, that it happened.

My eyes were on the road, I swear they were and because they were, I saw the bright red ball as it very quickly rolled into the street…….. and behind it was a small little boy, who obviously wasn’t looking for cars at all.

“JADE!” was all I heard as I slammed on the brakes, at least I thought it was the brakes and I swerved away from the child……………through a hedge and right into the very old oak tree growing in the Henderson’s front yard.  I don’t remember much after that, as I sat on a bench by the tree, bawling my eyes out and being consoled by a paramedic.

Jin was talking to one of the police officers who had come to the scene, several fire fighters were there assessing the car………………..the yard was so full of people I didn’t know who was who except those wearing uniforms.  Several of the neighbours had also gathered adding to my humiliation and I just couldn’t raise my head, no matter how much I was asked, to be checked for injuries.

It wasn’t my fault.  I had never been behind the wheel before and I panicked, hitting the gas instead of the brake.  The Henderson’s were a very kind couple and most forgiving when they were told their beloved tree of 40 years would need to come down.  I promised them a new tree and apologized profusely while the tears ran down my face. Shortly after, the police dropped us at the rental house and Jin told me to go to bed.

“We will be leaving before first light,” he said a little more gruff than I think he meant to be.

I never thought I would sleep, but I must have fallen asleep right away and Jin woke me at four in the morning.  We gathered our things and walked out of the house….right into a group of reporters shouting questions at us and trying to snap photos.  I covered my face with one hand, leaned my face into his back and grabbed his shirt with my free hand.  He led me to the waiting taxi, remaining calm but ducking his face whenever a photographer got to close.

“Keep your head down,” and he shoved me forward from my back so my face was down onto my legs.  “Go!” he yelled at the taxi driver.

It took us longer to get home that day as Jin wanted to make sure we weren’t being followed.  I tried several times to talk to Jin about the accident, but all he kept saying was not to worry about it.  “The accident wasn’t your fault.”  It did nothing to make me feel better and I couldn’t tell if he was angry with me, disappointed or really believed what he was saying.  After arriving home, I retreated to my room and stayed there for the rest of the day.  I was a mixed up jumble of emotions and I couldn’t settle to anything.  I slept off and on, but ate nothing as I didn’t believe I could keep it down.  I did wake at one point to hear a conversation between Jin and Sun.

“You should have taken her to hospital.  She could be really hurt.”

“She was looked at by the paramedics.  She is fine.”

“She had a head on collision with a tree JIN, while sitting behind the steering wheel!  She could be very hurt and a paramedic is not a doctor!”

“She’s FINE!  She will eat when she is ready.  She’s probably doing it for attention!  Leave her be.”

Truth be told, I was a little hungry then, but there was no way I was going for food after that attitude.  Doing it for attention!  So I waited till after everyone had gone to bed and snuck a pile of food into my room.  So there Jin!  Take your looking for attention and just shove it!

Things were pretty quiet for the next few days and eventually we all settled back into our routine.  Jin had asked me to stay off the internet for the next two weeks and when I asked if I was being punished he said I wasn’t but please listen to him and do what he says.  I decided to be agreeable until Jilly sent me a text.

Oh my gosh, Jade!  Are you okay?

Uh, yes.  Why?

I was worried you were hurt!

Hurt?  No, I’m okay.  Why would I be hurt?

The accident!  How is Jin?

He’s fine.  Wait.  How do you know about the accident?

It’s all over the news Jade!  Did you really hit that kid?  Did he die?

WHAAAT?  NOOOO!  What do u mean it’s all over the news?  I hit a tree, not a kid!

Well that isn’t what the news is saying.  According to them, you were driving erratically, hit a kid and killed him!  Some papers are saying you are going to be charged with murder.

I gasped at what she was saying.  I didn’t hit him.  I didn’t hit him!  Why would the papers say I hit him?!

Here, this is one of the pics from the paper.

And there is another one of you being led away by a police officer and put in the back of a cop car.

I threw my phone on my bed and sat down at my computer, but the internet had been turned off.  I tore open my door and stormed over to Sun and Jin who were in the kitchen.

“Turn it back on!”  Tears had begun running down my cheeks in both anger and the the raw feeling of panic.  “Turn it back on.  Do you know what they are saying I did?  What they are printing about me?  They are saying I killed a kid!  I didn’t hit him!  I missed him and hit a tree!  They are calling me a murderer!”

Jin had started walking towards me with his hands up in an attempt to catch me.  “I know,” he said quietly.  But I was flailing my arms and he couldn’t touch me.

“I didn’t kill him!  Why would they say I killed him?  I didn’t kill him.  Why Jin?  Why?”

“Okay, okay.  It’s going to be okay.”

“Okay?  How can you say that.  It’s never going to be okay again.  I’m a murderer, or didn’t you know?”

The anger seemed to have drained completely out of me and I slumped to the floor in complete defeat.  “I didn’t kill him,” I said quietly, just in time for Jin to get his arms wrapped around me.

“It’s going to be okay,” he said.

“We have to fix this, will you fix this Jin?” I whispered

Later, when I woke in my bed, Sun told me I had passed out from the shock of hearing the news like I had and from lack of food.  She shoved a plate of food at me and told me to eat, slowly so I didn’t throw it up.
I looked at the plate of food Sun brought me and in my state of low blood sugar couldn’t help but think, bread and water for the criminal, how appropriate.

It took a few weeks and the help of a very expensive lawyer, for Jin to get the “misunderstanding” fixed and the story set to rights.  Once the boy who had run into the street in front of me had been found, the story went away fairly quickly.  But as they always say, once anything is in print on the internet there is no making it go away.  From now on, every time someone Simgoogled my name, the story of my being a murderer would always be found.

Jin had taken away my phone and when I got it back, Jilly apologized at least twenty times for being the one to let me know what was going on.  I told her there was nothing for her to be sorry for.  True friends always looked after one another through the good times and the bad.  No matter what I said, she still felt incredibly bad.

Surprisingly I also had a message from Travis, who I hadn’t heard from in five months since he sent me that one and only pic of the puppies.  He texted to let me know that he had seen the news but didn’t believe a word they said.  He was hoping we were all doing well and to keep my chin up.  Odd thing for a guy to say I thought, but what was more amazing was I didn’t feel that same giddy excitement at hearing from him.

In fact, I didn’t feel really much at all. It was as if, the life had been sucked out of me and I didn’t know how to get it back.

 

 

The thing is, no matter how bad things are, they can always be worse…………………………….

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Jilly’s responses were provided by RM and I thank her very much for working on this with me.  We will be seeing more of Jilly in the upcoming chapters until…..well those of you reading RM’s story know what I am referring to.  But if you don’t, here is RosemaryMarie’s awesome blog site: www.booomcha.com  

Also, did you know that there is no cell phone accessory to be found for teens?  I’ve made three poses so far for Jade to use with a cell phone!  So I hope everyone doesn’t mind that I have poses without a phone!  Two are in this chapter and one is in a previous chapter.

If you like the poses you see here, you can find some of these and even more, at my pose site: http://www.posesbybee.com

The Christmas cards are by Severinka and found on TSR, as well as the other decorations.