Chapter 7 Good News, Bad News or Undecided?

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Screenshot-011“You will not believe what the “parents” just told me after breakfast!”

“Really! I can tell by your voice this sounds important! Did they tell you something big or something little?”18083854_1911893789089950_918055155_o

“Oh, it’s big. Pretty big I’d say.”

 Jilly quirked her head at me in thought.  “Hmmmm…… so did what they tell you make you happy, sad or mad?”

 

Sigh, “I’m not sure yet. I think I’m happy. I mean I want to be happy….but I think I’m a little mad as well to be honest.”Screenshot-014

“Oh my! Please just tell me, the suspense is killing me!” Jilly exclaimed.

 “Get ready for this. Sun and Jin…………..are having a baby.”

 

 Jilly squealed.  “Wow! I can’t believe it! Oh but, I can see why you’re happy and mad all mixed up.”

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“Yeah, no kidding!  Now!  I mean now?  They were so adamant there would be no other kids in this house.  Why now?  I’m not a kid anymore. I swear it almost seems like they did it just to be mean!”

“The timing is kinda weird, true, but I don’t think they’re trying to be mean.”

 “I wanted a sister so badly Jilly and they knew that! I’ve been so lonely on this island.  Why now?  Why not before?”
 
“I dunno,” Jilly said.  “What did they say exactly?”18012893_1911893819089947_206302734_o

“Okay, so here is how the whole thing went down…….

 
Jin started out by criticizing the outfit I was wearing.  Like, really Jilly what is wrong with what I am wearing?  Do you see anything wrong with this?  Seriously, even if there was something scandalous about this outfit, who is going to see me here?Screenshot-030
Anyway, Sun did that thing she does; her silent communication that I have learned Jin knows so well, and shut him up.  Never mind, he said.
 
Then they just started talking, stumbling over each other’s sentences in an effort, it seemed to make this all seem like it was no big deal, yet wonderful all at the same time.Screenshot-13

They had good news, they said.

Came as a complete surprise to them, Jin said.

 

I should be happy because I was finally getting what I always wanted. Pul-ease!”

 

I shook my head, remembering the looks on their faces and the things they said to me in vivid detail.
 
“Actually, now that I think about it, Jin was really excited about the news and Sun was more focused on making sure I was okay with her comments.
 

This won’t change anything, she said.

 

We will always love you just the same as we always have.  


Freaked me out I have to tell you, but then, oh you will never, ever guess what happened next.”  Jilly shook her head at me, staying silent, and waiting for even more from me to spill out.

“When they finally stopped talking and looked at me with such hope on their faces, I gave my head a mental shake from all their words swirling around in my mind. Then, before I even knew exactly what I was saying, these words just fell from my mouth:

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Are you out of your mind?  I mean, do you even hear what you are saying?  What you sound like?

Jilly, I will never forget the hurt looks on their faces when I said that.  Sun literally gasped and Jin just looked stunned at first.Screenshot-16  I could tell he was going to lose his temper and my heart started to beat in my chest, but before he could say a word, Sun interrupted him. I know this has been a shock, Sun said to me.  It was for us too. Maybe we will just leave you alone for a while to get used to the idea.
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Then they got up, went back into the house and I just sat there, staring, yet seeing nothing at all.  I was blank.  No thoughts.  No feelings.  It wasn’t till I realized that I had started shivering, actually shivering on such a hot day, that I began to feel anything at all.”
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I sighed and looked at Jilly’s face for any signs of what she was thinking.
 
“Yes I know what I sound like, you don’t have to say it.  I just can’t help it.  I’m a jumbled mess of every kind of emotion right now.  I do hear how immature I sound.  I should just be happy, right?”

“I don’t know. I mean, maybe you can’t be happy right now until it really sinks in. It’s pretty big news.”

“Yeah, I guess.  You are probably right.”  I took a big breath, attempting to shake off some of the uncomfortable feelings I was carrying.
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“Oh no. I’m sorry, Jade, but I have to go. I can hear my mom and Leo downstairs. That means the bus will be here any minute. I hope we can talk soon! Let me know how you’re doing!”

“Okay, bye.  Have a good day at school!”  Jilly waved at me before the screen went black.

 

 “Wish I could go too,” I muttered to myself.

 

After talking to Jilly, I paced around my room for a while, opened my homework books then promptly closed them.  I even thought about starting a letter to Violet, since I hadn’t written to her in two years or so.  Yet I couldn’t settle to anything.  I felt like I was jumping out of my own skin, full of anxiety and I was beginning to get a bit of a headache.

I did this to myself, I thought, no one to blame but myself.  But seriously!  How did they think I was going to take that news?  What I needed was out of the house, and even though I hadn’t been sent to my room, I “snuck” out the patio doors like I was disobeying an order, when I was sure no one was looking.


I wasn’t  by myself for very long though.Screenshot-017As soon as I heard footsteps, I knew exactly who was coming, and didn’t even bother to look up as Grand-Mere sat down in the grass beside me.Screenshot-018

“You don’t have to say anything.  I know I have to apologize.”

 

“I wasn’t going to say anything at all,” she replied.  “I figure you are old enough now to know when you have done wrong.  I’m happy to hear I’m not wrong.”

 

“Just imagine how different this whole thing would have been had they decided to have a child when I was a child and begging them to do so.”

 

“Well, first off, they didn’t decide to have this child in the first place I don’t think and secondly, while the outcome will be different, isn’t the sentiment still the same in the end?”

 

“I guess,” I replied.

 

“You know Jade, I was just a young teen when your Mama Sun came into our household.  Did you know that?”

 

“But your my Mama Sun’s mother too.  Wasn’t she adopted by both of you?”

 

Margot chuckled.  “I wondered if you had ever put that together.  I’m far too young to have adopted a child all those years ago.  My sister raised me after our mother died.  My mother had me later in life you see and by the time Manon had reached her early adulthood, she decided that she was destined to be a spinster.  But she wanted a child as well, so she adopted your Mama Sun.  I still remember the day she brought her home. We were sitting on the couch, looking into her beautiful face when Manon turned to me and said “Margot, you have been my child for so long.  Even though you are my sister, I have felt the bond of motherhood with you as well and you have been the greatest joy of my life.  Today, we are adding to our family and together we will raise this little girl to be our own. She will be our greatest joy.  When Sun began to talk, she just called both of us Mama on her own and we never did correct her.”

“Does she know?”  I asked.

“Yes she does.  But the point is, that families come in all different shapes and varieties don’t they?  Sun is technically my niece and daughter to my sister by a legal piece of paper.  You readily accept Sun as your mother even though she has no legal claim to you, nor is related by blood.  Yet you stomp your foot in anger and discord when anyone dare suggest that the one person who is related to you by blood in this family, acts as a parent to you.  For Jin really is your father Jade, even though in essence he is brother.”  Margot paused and waited for me to look her in the eyes. “You really are a very lucky girl, for not all brothers would have stepped up to raise a sibling, to care for a sibling and their welfare, the way Jin has done for you.  He loves you, more than you will ever know.”

Grand-mere was right I knew, for she always was, but I needed to think about what she was saying.   How did I think of Jin? An annoyance, a brick wall, the person that was always frustrated with me.  Father, not father.  What did I really feel he was to me exactly?  All I knew was, I didn’t want to think about it now.  I was going to need a distraction.

I turned to my grandmother and smiled.  “You know grandmother, your English has greatly improved over the years.”

She smiled back at me before saying, “Why thank you Jade, but that tactic is not going to work with me.” Which she finished off by wagging her finger in my direction as well. 

“Okay, okay!”  I sighed.  “I will go and apologize to Sun.”

“To Sun and…………”

“Fine.”

I stood up and pulled Margot up to stand with me.  Looking over the cliff and down towards our home, I could see Jin in the yard with Sun.
Screenshot-020 Things looked different in that moment.

“Everything is going to change now, isn’t it?”  I asked.

“Yes.  Yes it sure is.  But change is often a good thing and no matter how you feel now, when that baby arrives you will be very happy.  Trust me, I know, because it happened to me.”  She started to walk towards the hill, then turned back.  “Are you coming?”

“I will.  Just give me a minute.”  Margot nodded her head and continued on down.

I took one last look back at my home,
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 .……………and promptly burst into tears.
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Special thanks to RosemaryMarie for collaborating with me to write this chapter. All of Jilly’s responses and the pictures of Jilly were provided by RM and I thank her very much for working on this with me.  We will be seeing more of Jilly in the upcoming chapters until…..well those of you reading RM’s story know what I am referring to.  But if you don’t, here is RosemaryMarie’s awesome blog site: www.booomcha.com